It's Not Just a Dream

Ever since I went on my senior class trip in elementary school I realized that I want to live in Israel. As I toured the country with my class I realized that Israel is different that any other country and I felt that it was the place I belonged. I have visited numerous countries around the world and I have never felt the same feeling as I did when I was in Israel.

When I would try to explain this feeling to other people I wasn't able to and I could never understand why. Later I realized that this feeling has something to do with the neshama(the soul) and since it is something spiritual it can not be put into words. Ever since that trip, that feeling has always remained with me and I feel that the only place where I belong is in Israel. It is the only place I can call my true home. Since I discovered this feeling I have also been faced with a dilemma that is common to people who want to make aliyah but for various reasons they are prevented from doing so. I have this burning desire to live in Israel but at this moment I am unable to move and it pains me not to be able to live in the Eretz Hakodesh that was promised thousands of years ago to Avraham Avinu.

Thank G-d I have been able to return to Israel many times, but every time I have to leave I am faced with the same dilemma. I have always heard that everything is in Hashem's control and that whatever one's life situation is, is what has been chosen for that individual by Hashem. This means that even the place where one lives is also determined and if they are supposed to live in that specific place, any plans they make to leave that place with not follow through. I have always believed this to be true, but it took a while for it to finally sink in. It was only after I came back from my recent trip to Israel that I took this lesson to heart.

Before I boarded the plan I thought to myself, why is it that I am able to visit Israel but I am not able to live there? Then I thought about this lesson and it became clear that for some reason that I am currently not aware of I need to continue living in Los Angeles. There is a reason why Hashem has not allowed me to live in Israel and I need to accept this. I also realized that though I am forced to live in Chutz L'aretz it doesn't mean I should give up on my dream, but at the same time I need to accept my current life situation and make the best of what I can before I can finally return home forever. May we all merit to return back home soon with the Geulah Shelamah. AMEN!